


In Our Hearts

by giantsequoia



Category: Mass Effect: Andromeda
Genre: Angst, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-25
Updated: 2017-06-25
Packaged: 2018-11-18 22:20:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,581
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11300016
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/giantsequoia/pseuds/giantsequoia
Summary: For a prompt. Scott reacts badly to the news of what happened in the Milky Way after the Arks' departure.





	In Our Hearts

“ _Please... don’t forget us,_ ” said the recorded voice. “ _Keep us alive in your hearts, and tell your children of the wonders that once were._ ”

Scott was crying, clutching his face and rocking back and forth in his father’s old desk chair, staring at the console screen through his fingers. His mind was full of that horrible sound he’d heard in the turian SOS, and chaotic, nightmarish images of faceless, tentacled monsters laying waste to every planet he’d ever visited in the Milky Way. Including Earth.

“ _On behalf of the crew of the Normandy SR-2, this is Dr. Liara T’Soni... signing off_.”

Scott waited a moment, but there was nothing more. “Is that it?” he said in broken disbelief, reaching out a hand wet with tears to scroll through the logs once again. “There’s _nothing_ _else_?”

“That is all, Pathfinder,” SAM said gently over their private channel.

“Well, what the _fuck_?!” Scott said desperately. “There must be _something_... she talked about a weapon, they were building some sort of weapon. Did they finish it? Did it work, did it turn the tide?”

“Unknown. I am sorry, Scott.”

“I... I’ve heard the news saying something about beacons,” Scott said slowly as his mind raced down one awful path after another. “The Initiative left QEC beacons behind in the Milky Way. And since we got here they’ve been – unanswered.”

“Yes.”

“So they’re dead,” he cried in agony. “ _They’re all fucking dead_. The whole galaxy is dead and they died in horror.” He hiccupped, then shuddered as another sob wracked his body. He curled into himself, slipping out of the chair. His knees hit the floor with a thud.

“Scott, we do not know if that’s true. If they died, we do not know how. Civilization in the Milky Way was advanced, and widespread. It is unlikely that there were no survivors of whatever happened.”

“You don’t know that there _were_ ,” Scott retorted, voice cracking through his tears. “How can you know... how can _anybody_ know? They’re all gone. They were gone when we got here. They were gone just a few years after we left. They’ve been gone _all this time_... while we slept in dark space, they were fighting and screaming and dying, and then there was nothing. For six hundred years there’s been silence at the other end, and we never knew.”

Scott was staring at the floor, but he wasn’t seeing it. His skin was clammy and his hands were trembling. The sounds of the room, the hum of the console and the deeper hum of the _Hyperion_ beneath him, were fading away. It felt like a cloud of sulfuric fog was enveloping his head.

They’re all gone, he thought over and over again. They’re all gone.

Distantly through the fog, he made out SAM’s voice in his ear. “Scott, you are experiencing an acute stress response to this news. I will counteract the physiological effects. Please try to take deep breaths.”

He tried, taking a few hitched, shuddering breaths that gradually came easier and fuller.

It felt like a long time before the darkness cleared from his vision and he saw the floor of his father’s quarters in front of his face. Dully, he noted the reflected glimmer of a few tears that had fallen from his eyes.

His skin now felt hot. His T-shirt was soaked with sweat; his whole body felt like it did when he overtaxed his biotics.

“SAM?” he said hoarsely. “I... how long was I out?”

“A matter of minutes,” SAM responded. “There was no permanent harm. I suggest you lie down on the nearby bed while you recover.”

Scott tried to pick himself up, but his knees were shaking. With the support of the desk, he managed to climb back into the chair.

He stared at the open logs for a minute, ignoring SAM’s suggestion. At one point his arm twitched as he decided to listen to them again, then stopped as he immediately changed his mind. His breath was coming steadily, if a little shallower than usual.

“I have to tell someone,” Scott finally decided. “I can’t keep this to myself. I have to tell... Tann, Kesh... the others. My team.”

“Scott-” SAM started to say as Scott reached out to close the logs. Before the files vanished, Alec’s voice spoke again.

“ _I’m securing these Milky Way reports_ ,” the recorded message said. “ _This is the only copy and I don’t want it getting out. Whatever happened was 600 years ago. Someday we might break the news to everyone, if the time is right. I guess we always knew there was no going back_.”

Scott stared at the screen, stunned, his arm still outstretched.

“Files sealed,” SAM said. “I cannot break this encryption; Alec has placed a block in my programming that I cannot remove.”

Scott let his hand fall to his knee. Then he stood up slowly and turned around, lifting his hands to clutch the side of his head.

“Are – you – _fucking_ – _kidding_ _me_?” he nearly shrieked. “Dad, you unbelievable _fuck_ head, you piece of shit, you.... _UGH_! _No_! Why would you... why would make me keep this secret? Why would you put _this_ on me on top of _everything else?!_ ”

Livid and intolerably frustrated, Scott roared wordlessly and kicked the chair as hard as he could, infusing the blow with biotic force. The chair hurtled across the room and crashed into the shelf in between the console and the door, breaking. Alec’s coffee machine clattered to the floor and the glass carafe shattered.

“FUCK!” Scott screamed. Slowly he sank to the floor, supporting himself with one hand to stop himself from simply collapsing. He leaned his face into his hands and started crying again.

“Scott,” SAM said gently, and for the first time since merging with the AI Scott thought he heard a trace of genuine worry in his partner’s voice. “You do not have to keep this secret alone. I know it as well. And if you wish, you could tell someone else.”

“How?” Scott moaned, rocking back and forth. “Who would believe me? Without those logs, how can I prove it? How am I not just insane?”

“I can verify what you say.”

“People would just think....” Scott shook his head. “That I made you say it, or that you... something. I don’t know. Maybe they _would_ believe me if you backed me up. But I... I don’t know.”

“It is up to you if you wish to share this, and if so, with whom,” SAM said, and Scott shivered as he felt something that was _almost_ – but not quite – like a spectral hand stroking the back of his neck. “Whatever you decide, I will support you as always, Scott.”

Scott staggered to his feet and made his way carefully over to the bed. As he did, the door to the hallway opened. Sara entered the room, followed by Dr. Carlyle.

“Scott?” Sara said, and then – seeing his pale, tear-streaked face and the broken chair and glass on the floor, rushed over to him. “Scott, we were passing by and we heard crashing – what is it? What’s the matter?”

Scott sat down heavily on the bed.

“I....” What could he say?

Dr. Carlyle had approached and was scanning Scott with his omni-tool. “Scott, it’s okay,” he said soothingly. “We’re here now. You’re going to be okay.”

Sara sat down next to him and wrapped her arm around his shoulders. “What happened?” she urged.

Scott took a deep breath. SAM was silent.

“I... I’m fine now,” he said, a little unsteadily. “I just had a... a panic attack. And, um....”

He looked at the broken chair and coffee machine, feeling horribly ashamed.

“And some... other emotions,” he finished weakly, hating himself.

“Oh, Scotty,” Sara said sympathetically, turning him so she could hug him fully. “I’ve been there. I know how horrible it is to feel that way.”

“It’s... it passed,” Scott mumbled. “It _will_ pass. I think I just need to lie down for a bit.”

“Your stress hormones are very high,” Dr. Carlyle said concernedly, consulting his omni-tool. “Are you sure you’re okay, Scott? This – whatever it was – looks like it was more than just a panic attack.”

“It was a bad one,” Scott said, leaning into Sara’s hug and trying not to cry again as more awful images raced through his mind. “I just need time.”

Dr. Carlyle nodded and turned off his omni-tool. “I’ll leave you two alone,” he said. “Come check in with me later, both of you – please?”

Scott nodded without meeting his eyes. There was a moment of silence as Dr. Carlyle and Sara apparently exchanged some wordless communication, and the doctor left.

“I’m here now,” Sara said to him, hugging him and rocking him like their mother had once down for them both. “You’re not alone, Scotty. I love you.”

“Love you too,” Scott whispered back. “Thanks, Sara.”

 _Please... don’t forget us,_ Dr. T’Soni had said. _Keep us alive in your hearts._

_Tell your children of the wonders that once were._

He would, Scott decided. He wouldn’t forget them, not ever. He would keep them alive – even if for now it was only him and SAM that knew, even if it would be only them for a long, long time.

And one day he would tell his children of the wonders that once were, and the people of the Milky Way would live on in story and song. He would see to it.


End file.
